lately, i’ve been wondering if monogamy is realistic, or something i should aspire to, because it seems like all of the people i’ve been attached to have turned out to be phases. and you could’ve never told me then — while i was falling in love and sharing air and drowning in eyes — that this person was not going to matter someday. i would’ve never believed you, that’s what love is like. so i guess what i want is more than love. i guess what i is someone who becomes part of me, who is there even when they aren’t, who runs through my veins and my mind and my limbs whether i want them there or not. less of a phase, more of a depression.